Outside Kinda Guy

Tanner has loved being outside from the time he was born. He had colic really bad the first four months and the only thing that would semi calm him was to be outside. No surprise his first real word was tree! Well the weather has been gorgeous here lately so we have been spending most of our time outside. We run every morning then feed the ducks and play at the park (and that right there explains why I already have a stinkin farmers tan in March! Tanning easily is not all it's cracked up to be). Then we usually go visit grandma and have lunch with her. When we get home Tanner and I head out back and play in the back yard. Some friends of ours gave us their kids old sand table that they outgrew and Tanner has loved it so far. He fills up his dump truck, pours our gravel in the grass, pours sand in the dog water and pretty much anything else a wild 20 month old can think of.

Hmmmm. . . what else can I get into?

Last week I started cleaning out our flower beds, pulling dead plants and such and working the soil. Tanner thought this looked like great fun and I found him trying to pull my flowers that come back every year! Monkey see monkey do I guess and I don't think my flowers are going to fare very well this year with "Sir Pull it Out"!

I'm not pulling out your flowers! Promise!

I love being outside and so does Morgan so it's really nice to have a child who loves it as well! I think many backyard BBQ's with friends are in order this summer and hopefully teaching Tanner the difference between flowers and weeds!

On Cloud Nine

I am on cloud nine doing my happy dance, actually I did my happy dance in the middle of my run at the park with people looking at me like I was a weirdo, but oh well!!! I got the best phone call I could have asked for today! I have been fighting with doctors and insurance companies for months now to have a surgery done by an amazing doctor in Chicago. There has been so much run around, red tape, paperwork, worry, stress, sadness and finally triumph! I have been approved to have surgery in Chicago for our "in" network co pays (still a lot, but much less than it would have been if we had to pay out of network prices).  I get to schedule this surgery on Tuesday and hopefully can get out there this summer. I am scared at the reality of being cut open, but so excited to actually dream about future pregnancies without worry, fear, or sadness! I get to be happy and excited to see what the future holds and if God will bless me with more little miracles! This has been the fight of my life, but I am so glad I didn't give up when things got tough and holding a healthy (hopefully full term) baby in my arms will be totally worth the past few months of uncertainty.

My husband has been my rock during this trying time in our lives. He isn't particularly religious, but told me to have faith in God, that he will lead us down the right path.  He has so much faith and always reassures me to have faith too. I guess I need to listen to him more often. Although this has not been an easy fight for us, I feel like it is just going to bring us that much closer. We have gone through a lot in the five years we have been together and with each trial and tribulation we seem to come out more in love and stronger than ever. I don't know what I would do without my amazing husband and best friend.

One hurdle down and although there are probably many more in our future, it's one down!! Next up scheduling surgery, doing "test runs" leaving Tanner overnight with my parents, having a yard sale to raise some airline ticket funds, and finally being open and excited about the possibility of having a "as close to normal" pregnancy as possible.

Thank you so much to family and especially friends (Sarah and Brittany) who have supported me on this journey with words of encouragement, open ears, and love. Thank you for not making me feel like I couldn't express my feelings and for not getting sick of my "sob story". Y'alls support has meant the world to me and I also wouldn't know what to do without both of you by mys side! Now just to get us all pregnant at the same time with babies numero dos. . .

Great Day!

Today has been such a great day! Mind you it is only 1:45 pm, but I could not have asked for a better day with my favorite little man! The day started out with us both waking up smiling. I am a horrible morning person and it usually takes me 20 or so minutes to get my barrings and sadly my son inherited that from me. But today was different. He woke up, rolled over kissed my forehead and laughed at my messy hair. That  made me laugh and got the dogs excited for breakfast. We had a yummy breakfast of yogurt and fruit and while I got ready Tanner watched some Supery Why and decided to give Daisylou a makeover! This kid is just to stinkin cute!

Tanner going on a reading adventure!

Giving Daisylou a much needed makeover!

After letting my kids brain rot a little with tv, we decided to go on a run to our favorite park. Tanner is such a good boy while I run and it doesn't hurt that I load his stroller up with all of his favorite snacks and bribe him with feeding bread to the ducks. I have never gone through so much bread, but it keeps him happy and keeps it out of my stomach and with swimsuit season fastly approaching that is a good thing!  We ran/walked 2.5 miles and then headed over to the ducks and the playground! I love watching Tanner play and even though he gives me a few heart attacks when he climbs the big equipment, I love that he is exploring and learning!  And, it is a great workout for mommy chasing him around and up the playground! 

Running, running, and more running! He must be hanging out with me too much!

Loving the slide!

When we got home the weather was just too nice to stay inside, so we headed out back to work on the yard. Daddy has been out of town all week so the dog poop was really piling up. I picked up dog poo and Tanner played in his sand table. We swept, pulled weeds, raked the dead grass and washed down the patio! It looks really good out there and I am hoping for warm nights so we can have dinner out back! We had a delicious lunch of grilled cheese and strawberries and then to my surprise, Tanner asked for mimi (which more often than not means ice cream, but today it meant go to sleep). He has been asleep now for about an hour!

Can't wait for the rest of the day! We still have so much on the agenda! We need to get a great yummy dinner ready for daddy when he gets home tonight and we are also meeting Braylon and his mommy for an evening run! I am determined to get in swimsuit shape, even if that means running twice a day :( 

I love days like today! Being with my son is the most amazing feeling. Sometimes it's hard being the one home with him all.day.long but then we have days like this and I dread the day that I will go back to work. God has blessed me with so much and I think today was just a reminder of that!

Weekend in Review

Well we have had one busy weekend! It started Friday afternoon with Tanner getting to hang out with his "gwapa". These two are best friends and love spending time together! I have never seen my dad so in love and am so glad my son has such an awesome role model!

Tanner and grandpa heading to the wood pile in the carreta!

Drinking water from the hose!

After all the fun outside, my parents took Tanner to his new favorite place, the merry-go-round at the mall. This kid loves the thing and my dad loves riding it with him! Told you these two were best buds!

Big smiles and grandpa is hiding!

Saturday was spent looking at new refridgerators (ours took a crap). After hours of looking we finally found the one at an awesome price! I love having a working fridge! Oh the things we take for granted!  Saturday was also a day filled with March Maddness! We are a huge sports family and basketball is at the top of the list! I love March and this year our Lobos made the tourney and had a chance to be the first Lobo team in history to make the Sweet 16! Sadly, Louisville ended our glorious season, but hats off to the Lobos! Can't wait for next year! Tanner has really enjoyed all the basketball games and is perfecting his shot!

Go, Go, Go!!!!

Sunday was a day of cleaning and organizing our house and new fridge (also buying food for said fridge). It was a nice relaxing day inside as we were experiencing tornado like winds here in good ol' Albuquerque! We spent time playing with legos, watching Tanner go poop in the potty, watching more basketball and eating a yummy salmon dinner a la the hubby! All in all we had a wonderful weekend and I am sad it's over.

What I really need. . .

Is one a few of these bad boys

This has been a tough week for many reasons and to make all of them even worse, Morgan has been out of town all week for work. I am running on no sleep and patience is wearing thin. My poor baby is sick, sick, sick and I am one tired lady! Croup and ear infections are not fun and I can't wait to get back into my married life routine! I think a girls night and sleep are on the agenda for me in the not too distant future!

Impact

Today was a rough day. It was a day that I knew was coming for a while, but that didn't lessen the pain at all.  Today, one day short of twelve years since my dad pulled the most adorable puppy out of his jacket and handed her to me, we had to say goodbye. Jessie was my dream. I always bugged my dad for a puppy and I always got the same answer "No".  When he handed her to me it was one of the best days of my life. Jessie was my best friend. I know that sounds crazy to say that a dog is your best friend, but she really was. She saw me through rough times during high school, she helped ease my broken heart on more than one occasion and she was the person I could tell all my secrets to. She loved me unconditionally and all she asked for in return was a game of fetch, a run, or a hug. I loved her so much and we loved her enough to end her suffering. She wasn't doing well and we all knew that the end was near, but it was so hard making the decision to let her go. I got to spoil her the last few days and got to say goodbye. My heart hurts, but I took comfort in reading this poem

Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge.
There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together.
There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.
The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....

Author unknown...

My heart aches. Jessie was my family. She impacted us in so many ways. She softened my dad, protected my mom, and out smarted my brother. She left us with so many memories and I thank God for blessing us with her. It is going to be so hard going to my parents house and not seeing her run to greet us, but I know she watching us just waiting until we meet again.

I love you Jessie and thank you for making the last 12 years so great and for showing me what unconditional love is!