Emotions

I have been an emotional wreck this past week.  I have moments of extreme happiness and then sadness and worry.  It all started last week when I read a blog of a woman who lost her four month old little girl.  It broke my heart and she was living my worst fear.  I worry so much about Tanner. I finally understand why my mom was always worrying about me and my brother.  The blog hit close to home with me because this woman was also a teacher and had just recently returned to work.  I could imagine myself in her position. I, however, made a choice not to return to work. I loved my job and really struggled with the decision. Lately I had been feeling like a failure and a loser for having a college degree and not using it, that was until I read the heartbreaking blog. I may not have my dream job anymore, and I may not have the "lifestyle" that I would have had if I had been working, but I have time with my beautiful little boy.  I would not trade one minute with him for anything. Sometimes I get down about what I don't have, but then I look at my amazing family and realize how lucky and blessed I really am.  Although the blog was heartbreaking, I needed to read it because it put what is important in my life in perspective.  I pray for this woman and her family and vow to live each day to it's fullest and love with everything I have in me.

I'm a BOY!

 As most of you who have seen my child know that the kid came out with a wild, full head of hair!  Morgan teased me that he looked like an ape (a very cute ape I might add) and has been bugging me since he was two weeks old to cute his hair!  Well I was not about to take on that task by myself after the infamous finger cutting incident, so I just kept putting it off.  After several people complimenting my "beautiful baby girl" I decided it was time to cut the long locks and start looking like a boy!  We decided to get his first haircut when he turned six months.  That day came and went and I was okay with it as my anxities began to grow.  Finally Sunday, Feb. 13th rolled around and it was time.  We originally were going to have my cousin cut his hair, but she was off on Sunday and impatient Morgan (or knowing that I would never do it) forced me to take him in!  Much to my surprise Tanner did well! No tears!  He got to enjoy a sit on mommy's lap with a sucker (full of hair) and everyone making all over him in the salon!  All in all it was a good experience, but I look at my boy and he seems so big and grown up! Time really is flying!

Tanner's before pic

 

 

What's going on?

 

 

 

What the hell are you doing old man?

 

Eating my hairy sucker and looking more presentable!

 

 

Rocking my new do on V-Day! Hello ladies!!!